iAmTypingThisOnAMac

In honor of the two-year anniversary of my switch from a small pink flip phone (also known as “the Barbie phone”), I celebrate with a list of the top ten names that Apple should consider renaming its beloved iPhone.

(10)          iText

(9)            iEmail

(8)            iDropCalls

(7)            iPlayUnblockMe

(6)            iDropMoreCallsThaniComplete

(5)            iDropCallsAnyTimeAndAnywhere

(4)            iHaveAnAppForDroppingCalls

(3)            iSearchForPornOnTheInternet

(2)            iAmTotallyNotKiddingAboutHowManyCallsiDrop

(1)            iDropSoManyCallsThatTheOnlyReasonYouWillKeepMeIsBecauseiSurf

    TheWebForPornAndPlayUnblockMe

(Note:  Mr. Jobs, I LOVE my iPhone.  I would never part with it . . . although I am considering owning a separate “phone” so as to allow me to actually complete calls.  I have encouraged at least three friends to purchase iPhones and they love them (though I haven’t actually spoken to them in awhile because, well, we have iPhones.  But we text a LOT!).  Did I mention I love you?  Please don’t sue me.)